My Sister’s Ultimate Simp

The entire school thought I was the school belle Wanda Stewart's biggest simp. I would send her breakfast during her morning run. I would offer her a towel and water during her matches. I would buy her pancakes from three streets away in the bitter cold just because she said she was hungry in the middle of the night. The boys in school who liked her could form a line from the mathematics department to the field. The look in their eyes changed from disdain to hatred. "He hasn't managed to pursue her even after all that simping. He really can take things in his stride." "Wanda is just good-natured. That's why she hasn't called the police." When the school hunk, Connor Graham, decided to publicly confess to Wanda, I became his greatest eyesore. While Wanda was out of school for a match, Connor came to me with his gang from the student council, kicking away the breakfast I bought for myself. Hot milk spilled all over me. He arched a brow and said with zero sincerity in his voice, "I'm sorry. I thought it was yet another bunch of trash you prepared for Wanda." With that, he pulled his phone out and flashed a remark that Wanda had made about me on the screen in the classroom. [A pain in the neck.] The entire class burst out laughing. Connor looked at me, clearly pleased. "See that? She finds you annoying. A man like you, stalking a girl all day, washing her clothes and sending her food... Don't you feel so cheap doing that?" Horace Jones, who stood behind him, chuckled. Connor smacked a letter of guarantee on my chest. [I willingly give up pursuing Wanda Stewart and will never send her food or water, follow her around, or pester her again.] "You can choose not to sign it." He waved his phone, a threatening smile on his face. "I'll just post a photo of you stealing Wanda's undergarment on the school's social media page." I looked at the photo of the white tank top I was keeping on the balcony of my own house and fell into deep thought. Wait. Since when did helping my sister with her laundry count as stealing? Chapter 1 Wanda Stewart had taken my father's family name, while I, Gerald Lindt, had taken our mother's. We were twins of opposite genders. I was born seven minutes earlier than her, making me her legitimate biological elder brother. No one at school knew this. It wasn't exactly because our family relationship was complicated. It was purely because on the first day of school, Wanda had stopped me at the school gate and solemnly enforced some rules. "Do not call me your sister at school." "Why not?" "It'll affect my reputation." I looked her up and down. "Do you even have that?" We even got into a fight after that. From that day on, we treated each other like strangers in school. I did everything, including sending her meals, delivering her water bottle, and tidying her study notes, because my mom paid me to do so. She said that Wanda was of weak health and I should do my duty as her elder brother by taking care of her, especially since she was preparing for a game, which was rather taxing. She would pay me 20 dollars to deliver breakfast and 30 dollars to accompany her for her morning run. If I did it for one whole month, I was even promised a bonus. I tolerated it for money. It seemed almost too good to be true that Connor was giving me the perfect excuse to stop doing all of this. I grabbed a pen and signed my name swiftly on the paper. Connor was stunned. He didn't expect me to drop Wanda like a hot potato. His eyes narrowed into slits. "You won't go back on your word, right?" "Don't worry." I handed the letter of guarantee back to him with both hands. "Only a rascal will go back on his word." Connor finally grinned at his victory. He had Horace put the letter of guarantee on the bulletin board, take a photo, and post it online. The photo was accompanied by a caption: [Someone finally knows his place. A simp should know his boundaries.] I liked the post and left a comment: [I wish you every success in your confession. May you two have your happily ever after and be stuck with each other forever.] Ten minutes later, my comment received over 300 sneering emojis in response. Connor thought I was simply putting up a strong front and came all the way to me to pat me on my shoulders. "Just cry it out if you're upset. We're all men. No one will laugh at you." I shook my head and said honestly, "I'm not upset." My mom had given me 600 dollars this month and put me in charge of all of Wanda's meals every day. Today was my fifth day doing so. Now that a third party had forcefully demanded that I stop working, I wouldn't need to return the money to my mom, would I? I was engrossed in researching domestic labor laws when our homeroom teacher, Amy Schultz, walked in. She saw the milk on the ground and furrowed her brows. Connor immediately explained, "Ms. Schultz, Gerald Lindt deliberately spilled his breakfast all over himself to frame me just because Wanda is ignoring him." My head snapped up. No, my friend. He had turned the situation against me faster than when my sister snatched the television remote from me. Amy looked straight at me. "Gerald, you've been harassing Wanda for so long. It's about time to stop. "Wanda will be jointly hosting the school anniversary celebration tomorrow with Connor. "I forbid you to go backstage or affect their rehearsal." Connor added in a low voice, "Ms. Schultz, I'm worried he might steal Wanda's clothes again." Amy’s face darkened. She confiscated my backstage pass and hurried me off to clean up and stop acting pitiful. I looked down at the back of my scalded hand. I didn't know that an apology had the ability to turn back time. I didn't know it could return the spilled milk back to its cup and make my scalds vanish. I pulled out my phone and texted my mom. [Mom, I signed a letter of guarantee and can't send meals to Wanda anymore. [Going against the letter will affect the school's reputation. [This is a major issue, and I suggest leaving Wanda to fend for herself from tomorrow night onward.] My mom was still typing when the bell rang. Amy pulled my phone away from my hand and locked it in her drawer. "I'll keep your phone with me for two days. Come get it from me the day after tomorrow during the morning self-study period." Before my screen turned dark, I managed to catch the first two words of my mom's reply. [Approved…] I sat back down in my seat. Great. My mom had approved it. Wanda was still clueless about what was going on. After returning from her volleyball match tomorrow, not only would she not have her meal delivered to her, but she would also see a "breakup agreement" signed by her beloved brother. I hoped she would remain strong. No sister would be able to handle being abandoned by her own brother. Chapter 2 In the afternoon, Amy was called out of class for a meeting regarding the school anniversary. The moment she stepped out of class, Connor flopped down on my seat. "Gerald, did Wanda pass something to you before going for her match?" I was busy completing an assignment and didn't even look up at him. "No." To be accurate, she didn't exactly "pass" them to me. She practically flung them at me. Yesterday afternoon, Wanda had boarded the bus headed for the volleyball match. Before leaving, she had stuffed two notebooks, a jersey, and a bank card into my arms. She had a great reason for doing so. They were too heavy. I simply couldn't understand. Would those things no longer be under the earth's gravitational pull the moment they entered my bag? Connor clearly didn't believe me. He seized the chance when I stood up to hand in my assignment to unzip my bag. At the next moment, my textbooks, some napkins, and a half-eaten bag of potato chips spilled on the floor. A black jersey came tumbling out. Connor's eyes lit up. "What's this?" He bent over and picked it up. "Can't you see for yourself?" "Why is Wanda's jersey with you?" "She asked me to wash it for her." Silence ensued in the classroom. The expression on Connor's face kept changing. In his world, washing Wanda's jersey wasn't a chore worth 10 dollars. Instead, it was a recruitment examination for a potential son-in-law of the Stewart family. He quickly stuffed the jersey into a transparent bag. "You've already promised not to harass her anymore. I'll return this to Wanda on your behalf." I was filled with deep respect for him. Wanda had worn this jersey for a two-hour volleyball training session and had even fallen into the mud during her training. When I opened my bag yesterday, the smell had attracted flies from a ten-meter radius. Connor taking the jersey from me was more than I could wish for. He pulled out a bank card from the side compartment of my bag. "You even stole her card?" "That's for our daily expenses." "You two share a card for daily expenses?" He scoffed. "Gerald, have you been daydreaming about marrying into the Stewart family?" I fell silent for two seconds. "Could there be any possibility that I'm referring to the daily expenses of an ordinary family?" The entire class broke out in wild laughter. Horace snatched the card and announced grandly, "This is stolen property. I'll hand it over to the student council for safekeeping." I reached out to try to grab it back. "That's my money in there, too." "Lies." Connor stared at me. "How could Wanda give you her card?" I said honestly, "Because she was too lazy to keep it." Wanda would always call me to make payments whenever she wanted to buy something. She would simply open her mouth, and I would do her bidding. My mom thought this was how siblings were supposed to help each other out. I thought this was what a life-sized parasite looked like. Connor was certain that I was just quibbling and pulled out a set of keys from the bag. "Are these keys to Wanda's house?" "Which is also my house." He walked to the window. "Since you can't seem to kick your nasty habit of sneaking into the Stewarts' home, let me help you with that." My heart leaped to my chest. "Don't be rash." Connor swung his arm. The key cut a perfect arc in the air and landed in the pond downstairs. It made a plop before sinking to the bottom of the pond. I leaned against the windowsill and watched it disappear into the depths of the pond. "Connor Graham!" He spread his arms out, palms facing up as though he were helpless. "I'm sorry, I slipped." "Over ten meters?" "It's windy today." The leaves on the trees outside were absolutely still. It was only windy in his imagination. I went looking for Amy in the staffroom. To my frustration, she said that she would wait for Wanda's return before asking for the bank card and jersey back. As for the keys, she advised me to get a new set. "Connor was just trying to protect his classmate's valuables. Don't keep thinking the worst of others." I almost burst out laughing. Was flinging my house keys into the pond considered protecting his classmate's valuables? All I wanted was to take back my own bank card, and that was considered 'thinking the worst of others'. It was clear that the school's rules and regulations were adjusted according to how much a parent donated to the school. When I walked out of the staffroom, there was another post on the school's social media page. [Male student keeps a secret stash of the school belle's belongings including her jersey, bank card, and house keys, seemingly trespassing the Stewarts' home regularly.] The post was accompanied by a photo of Connor holding Wanda's jersey in his arms. He looked just like a devoted, loving man holding a precious heirloom. He walked to me and said in a low voice, "I will hand these things over to Wanda personally at the school anniversary tomorrow. I'll show her just how disgusting you really are." I looked at the transparent bag in his arms. "You really should seal that bag tight." "Why?" "The jersey smells." The smile on his face stiffened. At the next moment, the smell of the jersey that had been locked in for three days drifted in the air. Connor's face turned green as he retched into a trash can. I stood next to him, patting his back soothingly. "Don't hold back. You went to great lengths to snatch it over, after all." Chapter 3 The next day was the school anniversary celebration. The moment I stepped onto campus grounds early in the morning, I felt all eyes on me. Some of them were filled with pity, and some of them were filled with disdain. Some guys even pulled the girls next to them behind them. It was as though I hadn't just stolen the school belle's clothes, but that I was also a hooligan who would go around stealing other people's girlfriends. Very soon, I found out the reason for their behavior. Connor had posted a photo of a tank top on the school's social media page. There were also photos of me leaving the Stewarts' home early in the morning, getting into a car with Wanda's jacket draped over my arm, and entering her bedroom in the middle of the night. He had thoughtfully arranged them all into a collage, which came accompanied by a caption that read: [From feeding her breakfast to barging into her bedroom in the middle of the night, how far can this crazy suitor go?] There were plenty of geniuses in the comments. Someone suggested that Wanda check for hidden cameras in her bedroom. Someone suspected that I had been secretly collecting strands of her hair. Someone even said that I might be crafting a life-sized figure. I was in awe of their imagination. Yet, why didn't their average score in the essay match up to their wonderfully rich imagination? The photos were all real. However, the first photo was of me leaving my own house. In the second photo, Wanda had complained that she was feeling warm before taking her jacket off and throwing it to me. In the third photo, my mom had asked me to go to Wanda's room to wake her. Wanda had 17 alarms set that day. None of them woke her up. As for that tank top, the photo had been taken while I was bringing in the laundry on the balcony. Wanda had thrown her white tank top and red socks into the washing machine, and her tank top had turned as pink as Barbie's clothes. I had posted the photo with a caption that read: [Ms. Stewart cannot take care of herself. I suggest a factory reset.] Connor had cut off the words and all the other clothes on the balcony, leaving just me and the tank top in his cropped photo. It would be a great loss for the media industry if he didn't end up being a content creator. I went looking for Amy in the staffroom to try to ask for the post to be deleted. She was busy sorting out the program for today's event. She spoke without even looking up, "I'll deal with it after the school anniversary celebration." "The post has spread across the entire campus." "Connor is hosting the event tonight and is also attending the award ceremony for outstanding students. Questioning him about such things will only affect his mental state." I read the insults posted on the school's social media account. His mental state was important while my reputation was gossip fodder. I reached out and attempted to grab my confiscated phone, but Amy slammed the drawer shut. "It's not time for you to get it back yet. Gerald, others wouldn't misunderstand the situation if you keep your distance from your female classmates." I was stunned by her statement. It appeared that my greatest mistake was not keeping a safe distance of two meters from my biological sister when we were both born. When I left the staff room, Connor was waiting for me at the door. He had a bunch of flyers in hand with my photo on them. It was accompanied by a caption in an alarming red font. [Stop campus stalking. Please stop stalking and harassing female students.] "Many parents will be attending today's school anniversary celebration." He stuffed the flyers in my arms and announced, "Give these out yourself. Take it as an apology to Wanda." I threw the flyers back at him. "No way." Connor didn't get mad. Instead, he said, "Then don't attend the anniversary celebration." He shot Horace a look. They then grabbed me by the arms and dragged me backstage. Connor opened the door to a room filled with old stage curtains and props. "Stay here until the event ends. I don't want you going onstage and making a fool of yourself." They pushed me into the room and slammed the door shut, and I heard the sound of a lock being turned. I pounced at the door and banged it hard. "Connor Graham! You're restricting my personal freedom!" Horace sneered. "Quit trying to scare us with big words. We'll release you once the event is over." I wanted to continue yelling, but my nose started to itch. A thick layer of dust covered everything in the room. I had been allergic to dust since I was young. My eyes started reddening within ten minutes in the room, and I started to feel short of breath. I banged the door hard with my fists. "Open up! My allergies are acting up!" There were two seconds of silence before Connor drawled lazily, "Quit acting. Wanda isn't back yet. There isn't anyone around to watch the show you're putting on." Their footsteps faded into the distance. Music started to play in the hall. The host announced excitedly that the school team was done with the match and was on their way back to school. I leaned against the door and slid down to the ground. Fine. If they continued to keep me locked in here, the first thing Wanda would have to do upon returning to school wouldn't be to attend the celebration. She would have to go to the hospital for her one and only biological brother. Chapter 4 I rummaged through the items in the prop room for a long time before finally finding a rusted metal pole. Instead of forcing the lock open, I smashed a hole in the ground. I crouched down next to the hole and thought about the possibility of having to compensate the school. If they really made me do so, I'd forward the bill to Connor. If he refused to take responsibility for it, I'd forward it to his brain. Surely at least one of these two would be empty. Footsteps sounded outside the door. I immediately banged hard on the door. "Anyone outside? I'm suffocating!" I could hear Henry's voice through the door. "I'll let you out if you agree to go onstage to apologize to Connor." "Sure," I readily agreed. "Open the door first." Henry wasn't that easily fooled, though. A phone slipped in under the door. An apology script was on the screen. I picked up the phone and pressed the record button. "Hello, everyone. I am Gerald Lindt. I'm currently locked in the prop room backstage by Connor Graham and Horace Jones. If anything were to happen to me, please have the police investigate this intellectually questionable male student outside the door." The phone was pulled away at once. Horace kicked the door in anger. "You can continue staying there and rot away!" I covered my nose and mouth and leaned against the wall for over ten minutes. A cleaning lady walked past while pushing a cleaning cart and heard me banging against the door. That was when she finally went looking for keys to the door. She jumped back in fright at the sight of how red and swollen my eyes were. "Young man, your face is so swollen! Quick, go to the sickbay!" The school doctor gave me some medicine and instructed me to sit down for half an hour to keep me under observation. I had wanted to listen to the doctor's orders. However, a loud overture sounded in the hall, marking the start of the event. My bank card and clothes were still with Connor. Although my house key had sunk to the bottom of the pond, I had to at least make everyone find out tonight that it wasn't the key to the door of romance. It was the key to my house. When I rushed to the hall, Connor was standing in the middle of the stage. He was dressed in a smart suit, carrying a bouquet of roses in his arms as he stood under a pink spotlight. It was as romantic as it could get. It almost looked like his wedding. The screen was playing a collage of photos of him and Wanda together on loop. On closer look, about 80% of them were cropped from group photos. In one of them, half of Amy’s head could be seen right in between them. The host announced excitedly, "Next up, Mr. Connor Graham will be publicly confessing to the one he's had a crush on for three years!" Wild applause broke out amongst the audience. Horace spotted me almost immediately. He charged at me with a bunch of student council members in tow and pushed me up onstage. "Since you're out, recite the apology script." A look of frustration flashed past the depths of Connor's eyes. But the next moment, it quickly disappeared as he flashed the audience a look of helplessness. "Gerald, I know you can't let go of Wanda, but love isn't possession. You should see clearly where you stand, with all the teachers and students of our school as witnesses." The screen switched to photos of me sending Wanda breakfast, holding her jersey, entering the Stewarts' residence, and even bringing in the laundry. The last photo was cropped from our family photo. Only Wanda and I were left in the photo. My parents, as well as the cake that had the message "happy family" iced on it, were all cropped out. A chorus of boos erupted from the audience. Connor handed me the microphone. "Admit that you've been harassing Wanda. Promise you'll never barge into the Stewarts' house, and I shan't pursue the matter regarding you stealing the bank card and key." I took the microphone from him and said, "The bank card is mine. So was the key." Connor sighed with disappointment. "You're still lying even now. In that case, I'll have Wanda reject you in person." The moment he said so, the audience erupted in cheers. The school team had returned ten minutes earlier than expected. Wanda walked into the hall, wearing the team jersey and dragging her luggage case behind her. Connor's eyes lit up as he rushed over to her with the bouquet of roses in hand. "Wanda, you're finally back. You no longer need to fear Gerald harassing you. "I've taken the bank card and house key he stole from you. "He's also agreed never to enter your house or touch your clothes. "All the more, he won't keep bugging you and calling you his sister." Wanda walked right past Connor and looked at the photos on the screen. She then turned her attention to my swollen eyes and injured arm. Her face darkened. Connor was still trying to claim credit for what he had done. "He had the gall to claim that he's your elder brother. He's the only one who could come up with a lie like that." Wanda fell silent for three seconds. "That's not a lie." The smile on Connor's face froze. Wanda took the microphone from me and looked coldly at Connor. "Gerald Lindt is my biological brother, with the same father and mother. Did you get my parents' permission before forcing him to cut ties with me?"