My First Wish: Stop Being Obedient

After the college entrance exams, my parents finally agree to take me to visit Everleigh Palace in Jatwick. I pack my bags a full month in advance, meticulously drafting a list of every wish I want to make—wishes for my parents, wishes for my siblings, and wishes for Joel Sutton, my childhood friend. The night before our departure, my younger sister, Yvonne Jarrow, suddenly announces that she wants to go to Novenport to see the ocean. My heart sinks. A second later, Dad pulls out his phone and starts changing our tickets. "The weather's been great lately. It's perfect for a seaside vacation," he says excitedly. Mom immediately swaps out her everyday clothes for swimsuits and hats. "The sun down south is brutal. I've got to pack plenty of sunscreen for Yvonne." My older brother, Stefan Jarrow, starts searching for seaside hotels. Without even looking up, he says, "I've been saying there's nothing fun in Jatwick anyway. Compared to Yvonne, Alice doesn't know how to have fun." I turn to Joel, pinning my last remaining hope on him. He once promised he would take me to Everleigh Palace so we could make a wish together at the old fountain. Now, all he does is cancel my flight ticket for me. "Alice, Yvonne means well. She just wants you to have a more enjoyable summer holiday," he says, his voice gentle but firm. He glances at me before adding, "Be sensible. Don't ruin the fun for everyone." Be sensible. I've been hearing those two words for the past 18 years. This time, I don't want to hear it anymore. Without a word, I cancel my flight ticket to Novenport. Instead, I use all my savings to buy a ticket to Jatwick. Days later, I stand before the old fountain at Everleigh Palace and make my wish with all my heart. However, this time, it isn't for anyone else. I make a wish for myself. Chapter 1 "You're not going?" The moment my brother, Stefan Jarrow, blurted out the words, the entire house went silent. My sister, Yvonne Jarrow, stood to the side. Her eyes were red, and her face was full of hurt. "Alice, do you really not want to go with me that badly?" she asked. Right on cue, her eyes filled up with tears, as if I'd just committed some unforgivable crime. "I don't want to go," I said quietly. "You don't want to go?" Mom frowned as she wiped Yvonne's tears. "Weren't you the one who kept begging to go on a trip to celebrate? We've booked the tickets, and now you're saying you're not going?" "The tickets are for Novenport," I said softly, my eyes dropping to the floor. Mom raised her voice and asked, "What difference does it make if we go to Novenport or Jatwick?" Dad didn't even bother to look up from his seat. "I told you we shouldn't have spoiled her so much. Look at her now. She's full of bad habits." I opened my mouth, wanting to tell him that wasn't true. Before I could speak, Stefan kicked my suitcase aside with a shrug. "Suit yourself. It's not our responsibility to change the whole family's plans just to accommodate your wishes." I stayed silent. Joel was the last one to walk over. He held a handful of candies. Back then, whenever I was upset, he would comfort me and give me some candy to cheer me up. Now, he walked right past me and placed an unwrapped candy into Yvonne's palm. "Don't cry, Yvonne," he murmured. "I'll apologize to you on Alice's behalf." Only after saying that did he turn back to me and reach for my hand. I pulled my arm away, avoiding his touch. Joel froze for a second. He frowned, and a hint of displeasure crept into his voice. "Alice, what does it matter where we go? The important thing is spending time together as a family. Don't be so petty." He softened his tone and added, "If you really want to visit Everleigh Palace, I'll take you next time. Okay?" Next time. I'd been hearing that phrase for 18 years. When Yvonne had her eye on the tablet I'd earned by ranking first in my class, Mom immediately gave it to her. "Let your sister use it to watch her shows. I'll buy you a new one next time." When Yvonne insisted on a mango cake for my birthday—the fruit I was allergic to—Stefan casually blocked my way. "You took so long to decide that Yvonne was already getting impatient. You can pick your own cake next time." When it came time to fill out our college applications, Yvonne decided she wanted to stay close to home. Joel changed my choices for me without a second thought. "We'll all stay near Yvonne so we can look after her," he reasoned. "If you're that desperate to go to Jatwick, you can always go there for grad school." Chapter 2 Each time, my family told me to wait until next time. Yet when next time came, they still chose Yvonne. It was almost time to board. Before heading out, Stefan glanced back at me. "Are you going or not?" Before I could even answer, Yvonne's voice drifted in from outside. "Stefan, I think the car is already full. With Mom, Dad, Joel, and me, there's no room left for Alice." The moment he heard that, Stefan turned around without hesitation. "Then, just take a cab to the airport yourself," he said flatly. "Just make sure you don't miss your flight. No one's going to wait for you." The door slammed shut with a heavy bang, and the house fell completely silent. I stood alone in the living room for a long time, frozen in place until my legs began to go numb. I pulled out my phone and opened the airline app. There were less than ten minutes left until check-in closed. I stared at the screen for a long time before finally tapping "Cancel Ticket." Then, using the savings I'd built up from my part-time jobs, I bought a ticket to Jatwick. They had no idea that, at the very last moment before the application deadline, I had quietly changed my college choices back to Jatwick University. My acceptance letter from Jatwick University, my dream university, had arrived yesterday. Once my flight was booked, I began packing my suitcase. Back when Dad was still building his business, we moved from one rental property to another. It wasn't until two years ago that we bought our own house. However, one thing had never changed. My bedroom always faced north. After years of barely seeing sunlight, my room smelled faintly of mold. There was a single bed, a desk, and a chair. That was everything I had in my room. I pulled a few faded clothes from under the bed and packed them into my suitcase along with some study materials. Just as I turned to leave, something on the desk caught my eye. It was a handwritten wish list. "Wishing Dad success in his business and good health." "Wishing Mom happiness and that she stays beautiful forever." "Wishing Stefan success in his studies." The very last one was for me. "I hope my family will always be happy and will always love me." Looking back, the wish I'd struggled so long to write almost felt like a joke. Just before I headed out, Joel texted me. "Alice, have you left yet?" The chat background was the first photo Joel and I had taken together. I'd kept it for five years. Instead of replying, I changed the background to a plain white screen. Before I left, I picked up the wish list from the desk, tore it into pieces, and dropped it into the trash. … My phone buzzed just as I stepped out of the house. It was a text from Stefan. "The plane's already taken off. So, you really didn't come? Fine. Have fun staying home by yourself. You're spoiled rotten." I stared at the screen for a long time before finally typing a reply. "Stefan, I got into Jatwick University. I'm leaving for Jatwick soon." The moment I sent it, a glaring red exclamation mark flashed next to the message. Stefan had blocked me. Not long after, the family group chat started filling up with notifications. They were sending pictures and videos of themselves at the beach. In one video, Yvonne was wearing an adorable swimsuit and the sunglasses Mom had packed especially for her. She was playing volleyball on the beach. Stefan and Joel stood a few feet away, keeping a close eye on Yvonne from the shoreline to make sure she didn't fall into the water. Now and then, Dad's warm laugh could be heard from behind the camera. In 18 years, he had never once laughed like that for me—not even when I got excellent grades or ranked at the top of my class. All I ever got from him was a cold, distant reply. "Keep working hard next time." Yet whenever Yvonne simply finished an exam, Dad would pat her on the head with a beaming smile. "What gift do you want? I'll buy it for you." Chapter 3 Mom tagged me in the family group chat. "We told you to come, but you refused. Regretting it now?" Then, she shared several photos taken at the restaurant. There were all kinds of local dishes and drinks from the southern coast. Not far away, some musicians were putting on a live performance. The place looked lively and fun. I knew better, though. None of that had anything to do with me. I stared at the beautifully presented seafood and drinks in the photos and let out a bitter laugh. I was allergic to both seafood and alcohol, so I couldn't have a single thing on that table. Without typing a word, I simply sent an "Awesome" sticker in the chat and set my phone down. After that, they stopped posting in the family group chat and posted everything on social media instead. The posts quickly filled with likes and comments. One of my classmates' parents left a comment. "Mrs. Jarrow, you guys went on a family trip? How come I don't see Alice?" Mom replied almost immediately. "Alice doesn't like noisy places. She's staying home by herself." "Alice is such a good kid. She's quiet, well-behaved, and does well in school. Unlike my child…" the parent wrote. I stared at those comments for a long time. Then, I suddenly remembered a Children's Day years ago, when Mom took us shopping for new clothes. There was one last dress left on the rack. Mom handed it to Yvonne without hesitation. "Alice doesn't like adorable clothes like this anyway," she told the salesperson with a casual wave. "We'll take this for her sister." I remembered another time when there were only two pieces of meat left on the plate. Mom gave one to Stefan and another one to Yvonne. "Alice is trying to lose weight. You two can have them," she said matter-of-factly. When we were even younger, it was always Yvonne sitting in Mom's arms. Whenever someone asked about it, Mom would always say, "Alice doesn't like being held." It seemed that, in this family, I was never allowed to have preferences of my own. If my siblings "liked" something, I had to "dislike" it. That way, everything could be handed over to them without anyone questioning it. … My train of thought was suddenly interrupted by a call from Joel. There was a strange hint of guilt in his voice when he spoke. "Alice, do you remember where you bought the bracelet you gave me?" I froze for a moment. "I didn't buy that bracelet." I had made it myself. There had been a time when Joel was constantly sick and in poor health. So, I went to a cathedral, climbed 99 steps, and lit a candle for him. I brought back a crystal bead that I later worked into a bracelet. Back then, Joel gently touched my hands. My fingers were covered with bloody cuts. At that moment, he made me a promise. "As soon as the college entrance exams are over, we're going to Everleigh Palace together. I want to make a wish for you, too." Yet now, he couldn't even remember where the bracelet had come from. As reality came crashing back, I answered quietly, "It broke, didn't it?" The line went completely silent. Then a tearful, trembling voice broke through the silence. "I'm sorry, Alice. I just wanted to try it on. I somehow broke it… There was one bead that looked different from the others. We can't find it…" That was the very bead I'd climbed 99 steps to get. Then came Joel's voice, gentle and full of concern. "Don't cry, Yvonne. It's no big deal. We can just buy another one." "You can't," I heard myself say, my voice eerily calm. "That bracelet is one-of-a-kind." The next moment, Mom chimed in, "Alice, what kind of attitude is that? Why are you yelling at your sister over a cheap, worthless bracelet? She nearly fell trying to find that stupid bead for you. Her ankle's all red." So, to her, it was just a cheap, worthless bracelet. I stayed completely silent. Yvonne's sobs grew louder through the speaker. "Please don't be mad at me, Alice. I'll keep looking for it." "Don't bother," Joel cut her off, his voice carrying a hint of annoyance. Then, he said to me, "Alice, your mom is right. It's just a bracelet. Why do you have to make a big deal out of it?" Chapter 4 "You gave it to me, didn't you? So, just consider it something I lost. Don't blame Yvonne for it," Joel snapped. I nodded and hung up without another word. A flight notification popped up on my phone, reminding me that there were less than three hours until departure. I zipped up my suitcase and walked out the door. Before stepping outside, I took one last look at the house. Every morning, I had to carry Mom's potted plants outside so they could get some sunlight. Then, I had to feed Dad's prized aquarium fish and clean the entire house before I could leave for school. When I came home in the evening, there was only cold leftover food waiting for me at the dinner table, along with a sink piled high with their dirty dishes. My eyes swept across the room before my gaze settled on a metal box resting in my hand. It was filled with all the little things Joel had given me over the years. For a long time, that box had been my only comfort in the house. I had carefully kept everything inside for five years. However, now, those five years felt like nothing more than a joke. My phone chimed. A message from Joel appeared on the screen. "Alice, I was a little harsh earlier. I'll bring you a gift when I get back. Be good." I stared at the message for a long time without replying. Instead, I shut the door behind me, dropped the metal box into the trash can by the entrance, and walked away. … The moment I stepped into the bustling terminal, my phone lit up with an incoming call from Stefan. "Alice, a few packages Yvonne ordered have just arrived. Go pick them up," he ordered without missing a beat. "Oh, and my game console. I think I forgot to put it away before we left. Pack it up so nobody breaks it." Dad's voice came faintly through the phone. "Did you feed the fish? They're worth a lot." Mom quickly chimed in, "By the way, Yvonne has a few dresses that need to be brought inside. Make sure you get those, too. The fabric can't be left in the sun for too long." Their voices overlapped as they talked over one another. I stared at the time ticking across the airport's giant departure screen and said nothing. "Alice, are you listening?" Stefan asked impatiently. I blinked and finally spoke softly. "I picked up Yvonne's packages yesterday. They're in the storage room. I fed the fish and watered Mom's plants, too. And I put your game console in the box you usually keep it in." There was a brief silence on the other end. Then Joel's voice broke the silence, carrying a light, triumphant laugh. "See? What did I tell you? Alice is always so sensible. She definitely didn't mean to yell at Yvonne." He had used the same word again—"sensible." In 18 years, Yvonne had been called all kinds of things. She was cute, innocent, spoiled. However, for all 18 years of my life, I had only ever been described as sensible. I smiled. I hadn't done those things because I was sensible. I simply did them because I didn't want to owe them anything. After today, I would have nothing to do with them. On the other end of the line, Stefan scratched the back of his head, letting out an annoyed huff. "So what? We brought you some local specialties, didn't we?" he argued defensively. "We got your favorite coconut cake. That's fair enough, right?" I laughed. For the very last time, I answered, "Okay." Just as I was about to hang up, an announcement suddenly echoed through the airport. "Attention, passengers traveling to Jatwick. Your flight is now boarding." Stefan froze on the other end. He asked anxiously, "You're at the airport? Where are you going?" I didn't answer. I simply hung up. Then, I opened my contacts and started deleting their numbers one by one—Dad's, Mom's, Stefan's, Yvonne's, and Joel's. With every contact I deleted, I felt a little lighter. Once I had cleared all my contacts, the final boarding call for the Jatwick flight was announced. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the new wish list I had written. There was only one wish on it. This time, it was for me alone. "I hope I'll do well in school and be happy forever."