The Stuck Klein Blue

I slit my palm and fed Irene Arlington my blood to keep her alive when we were trapped in a blizzard. The tissue in my legs had died from hypothermia. I had been in a vegetative state for five years. When I woke up, I heard a conversation between her and the doctor. “Mrs. Bradshaw, your husband’s condition is stable right now. There’s a good chance he’ll wake up. Are you sure you want to go through with euthanasia?” She spoke calmly, like she had already made up her mind. “Money isn’t the issue. I’ve already poured five years into him. I just can’t do this anymore. “With the way he is now, he’d be better off dead.” Those words hit me like a ton of bricks. Irene used to cry and beg me to stay alive. Five years had worn her down, and the woman I once knew was no longer the same. Chapter 1 Frederick's POV Footsteps stopped beside my bed, and I looked up to see Irene Arlington. It had been five years since I last saw her. She was not as emotional as I had imagined. She looked at me with a complicated expression. Her mouth opened as if she wanted to say something, but in the end, all she managed to say was, “Are you in any pain? Let me get the doctor.” My throat was dry. I wanted to speak, but no words came out. I could only manage to shake my head slowly. The room was quiet until the door swung open and a lighthearted voice floated in. “Ms. Arlington, didn’t you say you were taking me to pick out a birthday gift?” A young man barged in. When his eyes met mine, the smile on his face froze. He then looked at Irene hesitantly. She seemed awkward. She avoided his gaze and said to me, “He’s my assistant, Peter Lande.” Peter was clearly unhappy when she said that. His eyes welled up with tears, but he said nothing. I lowered my gaze. I felt a sharp ache in my heart. Peter looked and acted exactly like I used to. He was young and cheerful. He had a boyish charm whenever his smile revealed his snaggle tooth. He was exactly the type Irene liked most. She looked like she had had enough of the tense atmosphere, so she pulled Peter out of there. Shortly after, several doctors walked in. They ran all kinds of tests on me. Even though I was awake, the frost had done a number on my legs. Standing on my own two feet again would be next to impossible. I was not surprised by the outcome. Back then, I had not expected to survive after the snowy mountain incident. In the days that followed, Irene dutifully arrived at the hospital to keep me company. She massaged my legs and cut apples for me. However, she spoke very little. Whenever I tried to strike up a conversation, she listened quietly but did not respond much. She kept to a fixed schedule. The second the sun went down, she would head out. When I asked her to stay, she said, “I still have work to take care of. I’ll come see you tomorrow.” The hospital room door clicked shut behind her. I stared out the window at the fading sunlight. I could hear the nurses’ chatter outside the room. “Hey, did you hear? That guy who’d been in a vegetative state for five years finally woke up.” “I honestly never thought he’d pull through. Wasn’t his wife about to euthanize him?” My fingers moved a little on top of the blanket. Over the past few days, I had barely had a chance to find out what had happened to Irene over the last five years. She had not answered a single one of my questions. “You guys haven’t heard? His wife is very rich. She’s been paying for the best medicine money can buy this whole time. IVs, tube feeding—she spared no expense. All in all, she’s spent millions of dollars on him.” The voice sounded envious. But then, it changed. “But she has someone new now. That’s why she wanted to euthanize him.” When they mentioned that, Peter’s face flashed through my mind. I had known for a while. Even so, how could a person just walk away from a twenty-year relationship? On the day I was discharged, Irene picked me up. I stared at her, and on some strange impulse, I asked, “Can you let Peter go?” She was physically supporting me. I felt her body stiffen at my question. However, she did not answer. She simply changed the subject, like she always did. “The weather is nice today. How about I take you out to get some sun before we go home?” I grabbed her wrist and looked into her eyes. “Irene, what are you so afraid of? Didn’t you say he’s just your assistant?” The smile on her face vanished completely. She yanked her hand back and distanced herself. She took a deep breath and said, “Frederick, I never asked you to save me five years ago. “I’ve done more than enough for you all these years. I’ve wasted my money and my best years on you. “If… If I’d known it’d come to this, I’d rather we’d both died on that mountain.” I was so shocked that my breath came in ragged gasps. When she saw how lost I looked, her anger fizzled out. “Peter isn’t my assistant. I’ve been with him for three years.” She then said hoarsely, “It’s his birthday today. I’m going to celebrate it with him. “The driver will take you home.” She said those last words briskly and walked away. The way she hurried off made it obvious that she felt guilty. Chapter 2 I sat quietly in the back seat the whole way home. The scenes outside the window kept flashing past. I sat there in a daze as Irene’s words replayed over and over in my mind. When we reached the front door, the driver dropped me off. Five years had blurred the home in my memory. It was not as warm as I had imagined. The house looked like it had been empty for a long time. Dust covered all the furniture. The swing I had built for Irene in the garden was nothing but bare wooden planks. Everything was gone. Even the wedding photo on the wall had been taken down. I wheeled through the empty living room. All that was left in the bedroom was a bed covered with a dust sheet. I sighed when I saw this. Tears welled up in my eyes. Irene and I had been together for about twenty years. We met when we were young and got married soon after. Dreaming of making it big, we crammed ourselves into a tiny room under a hundred and eight square feet. We fought and struggled together for years before we finally built a life for ourselves in this city. After we got married, I bought this house with my first big paycheck. She said she loved looking at the ocean. This place sat on the lot closest to the sea. The coastline was visible the moment we pulled open the curtains. Back then, I thought I would be happy with her forever. For our honeymoon, she said she wanted to watch the sunrise on a snowy mountain. So, I took her there. But the weather turned bad that day, and a blizzard hit just as we were about to head back down. I pulled her into a cave that barely sheltered us from the wind and wrapped my coat around her. The two of us were trapped in that blizzard for seven days with no food or water. The weight and pressure of the snow were so intense that I could barely breathe. “Frederick, are we going to die? This is all my fault! I never should’ve dragged you up here,” she said tearfully as she blamed herself. I patted her reassuringly. To keep her alive, I cut open my palm with a knife and fed her my blood. My legs went numb from the cold. Every time I was about to pass out, Irene would pinch my wrist to keep me awake. “Frederick, hang in there! We promised we’d spend our whole lives together. If you die, I don’t want to live either!” I held on until the rescue team finally arrived. The moment they did, I lost consciousness. Irene cried like a child. She begged me not to die. “No matter what it takes, even if I have to trade my own life for yours, I’m keeping you alive. “Please don’t die on me. Wait for me! “When you wake up, I’ll still be your wife.” I wiped the tears from the corners of my eyes and curled my fingers into a fist. When I was discharged from the hospital and grabbed her hand, I could feel her pull away. I knew she was a germaphobe. With me, though, she had never let it show before. She had probably long forgotten her promises. Still, she was right. Over the past five years, she had done more than enough for me. I took out my phone and checked my account balance. The remaining money was enough for me to leave for good. I might as well let them be together. Chapter 3 Irene only returned home after dark. She was carrying bags of all sizes when she returned. Most of them were daily necessities. When she pushed the door open, she saw I was in the living room. She set the bags down on the table, crouched in front of my wheelchair, and said softly, “Frederick, don’t take what I said earlier to heart. I was just… “I’m just exhausted. I’m only one person, and I have to work while taking care of you. For five years, I’ve done my best. Anyone would be tired.” She continued cautiously, “After your accident, I couldn’t bear to be in this house. Too many memories… That’s why I never stayed here. “Don’t worry. I hired a caregiver. She’ll take care of you from now on.” Back then, those words would have moved me. But I knew she had already found someone better. She stood up. Her gaze swept over the plane ticket on my phone, then she said with a smile, “Once your legs are a bit better, I’ll go with you wherever you want.” I pursed my lips tightly and gave her a faint response. She glanced down at her watch and said, “I have to go now. “Pete has a temper. If he finds out I was here with you, he’ll be upset.” She sounded hesitant, as if afraid that I would make a big deal of it. I sighed inwardly and said, “Okay. I can take care of myself.” She seemed surprised. I looked away. I did not want to see that expression on her face. She was about to say something when her phone rang. Peter’s whiny voice came through from the other end. She was not irritated. Instead, she cajoled him patiently. I watched her from my wheelchair, feeling out of place. We were supposed to be husband and wife, but I felt like the third wheel at that moment. I stared at Irene with desperate longing. I was so hungry for any sign of love that I lied to myself, hoping to find even a trace of the affection she once had for me in her eyes. But there was nothing. Seeing her eager to leave, I asked flatly, “When are we getting divorced? After that, you can give your boyfriend a title that he deserves.” Her smile froze. She frowned and said, “Stop that nonsense. I’m leaving. I have things to do.” The door slammed shut again. Just as she had said, she had made sure I was well taken care of. She hired several caregivers. They were extremely careful with everything from helping me out of bed to taking me to the bathroom. But Irene herself was never there. She acted as if she had forgotten I even existed. When I asked for her new number, she said irritably, “Frederick, I have a job. I can’t be around twenty-four seven. “There’s a caregiver, isn’t there? If you need something, ask her. “I’m not giving you my number. If I do, you’ll probably max out my phone bill in a month.” She had said that more times than I could remember. I learned my lesson. I did not reach out to her even once for an entire month. Just when I thought my life would go on like that, Irene suddenly remembered me. She brought Peter to see me. He was dressed neatly and wore a ring that matched hers. They stood there in front of me with their hands intertwined. He greeted me with a smile. “Frederick, I know a guy who treated plenty of patients with your condition. “If you work hard at rehab, there’s a chance you could recover.” Irene looked at me with a smile and said, “This friend of Peter’s is hard to book, even if you throw money at him. “Frederick, you’d better thank him properly.” I smiled bitterly when I saw how affectionate they were. The doctors could not do anything. I doubted Peter’s friend could do anything to make me walk again. Before I could refuse, he stepped forward and pressed down on my leg. He then leaned in close and whispered, “Frederick, you’re a cripple now. Wouldn’t it be better to just take the hint and leave? “Rin was ready to put you down because of me. If you’d just slept one more day and died, at least you would’ve suffered less.” His fingernails dug hard into my wound. The sharp, stinging pain made me instinctively shove him to the floor. But from Irene’s perspective, it looked like I was deliberately mistreating him. Her expression darkened. She helped him up and yelled at me without even knowing the full story. “Frederick, you need to learn to be grateful! I know you’re angry, but Peter was only trying to help!” She took a deep breath and said mockingly, “They say people who end up disabled lose their minds. I didn’t believe it at first, but now, I get it. “You really disappoint me.” Chapter 4 After Irene was done throwing a fit, she dismissed the caregivers. As she walked out, she glanced at me and said, “Since you think you’re so capable, you can fend for yourself from now on. “I hope you don’t come crawling to Peter for help.” With no one to look after me, I could not do much. I had to crawl into my wheelchair by myself when getting out of bed. I even slipped while taking a shower. Three days later, I fell in the washroom and broke my arm. When I was taken to the hospital, they needed a family member to sign the consent form for the surgery. Only then did Irene rush over. Perhaps when she saw how pale my face was, she realized what she had done and guilt consumed her. She said apologetically, “I was just so angry last time. I’m sorry, honey. I was—” “It’s fine.” I cut her off. Whatever explanation she had prepared died in her throat. She looked at me in confusion, as if she had not expected me to be so calm. When I brought up divorce, she thought I was being unreasonable. When I pushed Peter down, she thought I was jealous. Perhaps she assumed that this time, I would make a scene just like before. “You’ve finally come around?” she asked cautiously. I nodded and said casually, “You’ve done more than enough for me all these years. You’re right. I can’t hold you back just because I saved your life.” Over the past few days, I had come to fully understand the truth about my situation and her true feelings. We had been together for more than twenty years. But the five years I spent in a coma were enough to ruin everything. Irene was not happy. She felt conflicted. She said quietly, “Frederick, don’t be like this.” During my days in the hospital, she stayed by my side at all times. She took on the role of a caregiver and looked after every part of my daily needs with meticulous care. She even chatted with me and painted pictures of our future together. “Once you’re back on your feet, we’ll go to Nordheim. “Glacieland too! The northern lights there are gorgeous.” I looked at her calmly. I had already seen every place she mentioned. They were all over her social media. There were the scenery shots, the couple photos, and even pictures of their home. In the three years she had been with Peter, she had already lived every future she was creating for me at this moment. I grew tired of the fake conversations, the lies, and the pretense. While she was happily fabricating our future together, I interrupted her. “Christmas is coming up. Will you come with me to see the Christmas tree in Central Square? “There’s something I need to tell you.” She agreed. On Christmas Day, I went to Central Square at the time we had agreed upon. After more than twenty years together, it was time for a proper goodbye. The place was crowded. Even so, I spotted her at a glance. Peter was standing beside her. “Didn’t you promise me you’d get a divorce? We’ve been together for three years! “Frederick is dead weight. How much longer are you going to drag him around?” He was throwing a fit. He grabbed her hand and said, “Divorce him. Let him officiate our wedding. “I’ve already picked the date. The fifteenth of next month.” That was January fifteenth. It was the day when Irene and I had gotten trapped in the blizzard five years ago. She did not agree, but I could see her hesitate. Her hesitation was enough to tell me everything I needed to know. The hope that she still loved me somewhere in her heart was gone entirely. I looked down at the boarding information on my phone, pushed my wheelchair forward, and did not look back.